August 14th is World Lizard Day. Get involved with celebrating World Lizard Day by sharing some Lizard jokes
I returned my lizard to the pet store as he wouldn’t stop telling dad jokes.
That’s not a lizard, the store clerk told me.
That’s a stand-up chameleon
I saw a lizard …
and it became a spotted lizard
What do lizards like to eat with their hamburgers?
French flies
Why did the lizard go on a diet?
Because it was overweight according to its scales.
What do lizards put on their kitchen floors?
Rep-tiles
What is a reptile’s favorite movie?
The Lizard of Oz
What’s a lizard’s favorite sport?
Cricket.
What did the mom chameleon say to her nervous kid on the first day of school?
“Don’t worry, you’ll blend right in!”
Why are lizards so mean and selfish?
Because they are too cold-blooded.
What is a gecko who knows magic called?
A: A Lizard Wizard.
A man walks into a bar with a lizard on his shoulder.
Walks into a bar
He goes up to the barman and says:
I’ll have a pint please and a gin and tonic for Tiny here
The barman starts making the drinks and asks
Why do you call him Tiny?
The guy says:
Because he’s my newt.
Why makes this Joke funny?
I returned my lizard…
Wordplay: The joke plays on the similarity between “chameleon” (a type of lizard known for blending in with its surroundings) and a “stand-up comedian.” The humor lies in the unexpected twist of the lizard being a “stand-up chameleon,” a pun on “comedian.”
I saw a lizard …
Pun: This joke plays with the double meaning of “spotted”—both seeing something and having spots. The humor comes from the playful ambiguity, where “spotted lizard” could mean either seeing a lizard or a lizard with spots.
What do lizards like to eat…
Pun: This joke is a play on “French fries” and “flies,” which lizards actually eat. The humor comes from the substitution of “flies” for “fries,” connecting the food preference of lizards with human fast food.
Why did the lizard go on a diet…
Double meaning: The word “scales” is a pun, referring both to the reptile`s body covering and the device used to measure weight. The humor arises from the clever use of a word with two relevant meanings.
What do lizards put on their kitchen…
Pun: This joke plays on the similarity between “reptiles” and “tiles.” The humor comes from the wordplay, imagining that lizards would put “rep-tiles” on their floors, combining the word “reptile” with “tiles.”
What is a reptile’s favorite movie…
Pun: This joke is a play on the classic movie title “The Wizard of Oz,” substituting “Wizard” with “Lizard.” The humor lies in the rhyming and the absurd idea of a lizard starring in a famous movie.
What’s a lizard’s favorite sport…
Double meaning: “Cricket” refers both to the sport and to the insects that lizards often eat. The humor comes from the clever use of a word that has a relevant double meaning for the lizard.
What did the mom chameleon say to…
Play on characteristic: This joke uses the chameleon’s ability to blend into its surroundings as a metaphor for fitting in at school. The humor comes from applying a literal trait of chameleons to a social situation.
Why are lizards so mean…”
Literal and figurative meaning: Lizards are cold-blooded animals, but “cold-blooded” can also describe someone as mean or uncaring. The humor arises from the double meaning and the playful insult.
What is a gecko…
Rhyme and wordplay: The joke rhymes “lizard” with “wizard,” creating a whimsical image of a magical lizard. The humor comes from the fun combination of a lizard and a wizard.
A man walks into a bar with a lizard…
Pun: This joke is a play on words, the humor arises from the double meaning: He`s my newt” literally means that the man owns a newt, a type of small amphibian. The phrase “my newt” sounds
